Our friends and family generously donated to our Honeymoon fund. We had both been slaving away this year and were desperate for some time off.

I guess, after looking through the photos, it appears as though our Honeymoon has been spent at skateparks! I’m not so self centred I promise! It is just were I usually have my camera. I haven’t been taking heaps of photos, it has been really great not having a phone and social media for most of the time.

Some stuff just doesn’t translate, or warrant the breaking of the mood for a picture. The memory of Jo in a summer dress, drinking beers in the gutter of the seedy rock and roll part of Hollywood whilst waiting for a pizza…this is a great memory. The mood would be disrupted by a clumsy iphone happy snap. We have been to some awesome dive bars and divey restaurants, and some quite upmarket ones, but I am not going to snap a photo of our food. You get the idea.

Jo always wants to stay in the grittiest part of West Hollywood. There is always something going down and an eclectic mix, and Jo will strike up a conversation with everyone. Whether you are cashed up or not, everyone is strutting around like a peacock wanting to be noticed. So if that means spending an extra $100k on your Bentley and basically ruining it, or adding unique flair to your bicycle then it is done, and flaunted with equal bravado.

Jo had always wanted to go to Disneyland, it was really fun. Just switch off all critical thinking for a while and enjoy the machine. The biggest roller coaster was pretty wild

On one of our long evening walks we decided to drop into a famous but run down comedy club, The Comedy Store on Hollywood. We scored a bunch of Hollywood heads trying out new material. Arseneo Hall did a half hour set, amongst others. We sat in the front row and got picked on a bunch and drank wiskey until the graveyard shift acts started to bomb

We got free tickets to a recording of Bill Maher’s Real Talk, yep the one with the much talked about Islam rant

We skated Venice Beach, I’m so glad Jo brought her roller-skates she has been on them a fair bit

I went shopping, needed more skateboards

We ventured out to San Pedro, and visited Channel Street DIY. It has been built by volunteers without permission or assistance from the powers that be. It is now legit and protected, and keeps expanding. It is epic, really difficult to skate. It was real hot but I got some.

There is all this cool stuff on the outside you don’t often see. It is so fun to flow through and try to link up

Jo on the trigger

We hit the road for Vegas. We stayed on the strip in New York New York, it has a pool, roller coaster, a fake statue of Liberty and 1000’s of people on pokie machines that look like their life force has been sucked out

Vegas is trying to shroud it’s ugliness with noises and bright lights. It’s glamour is an illusion to conceal it’s desperation. You don’t see people strutting about like they just won, you just watch the drawn faces of disappointment. Everyone is a team player to keep the illusion rolling, but you only have to scratch the surface to see the cracks forming. The weirdo in me loves it, the irony, the facade.

The strip sucks, it’s all about Fremont. That’s where the locals party and the tight arses gamble

Head to toe lemon. All night saxamophone. Ruling

Obesity in Vegas is at about 90%. People are big, bigger than anywhere I have seen. They had an industrial sized scale on the street and people gathered around in a weigh off. One dude tipped the scale at 377 pounds. I wanted to get a photo but it was not a great idea.

It’s where washed performers dreams are crushed.

Workin’ hard for the money

So hard for it honey

Jo likes to smoke cigars in Vegas

We checked out some Roller Derby. It was rad, grass roots and well skilled.

Big hit

I was indifferent to shooting guns, this was Jo’s idea. Once inside that range I was pumped. Never having dealt with guns, nothing prepares you for the noise and intensity. I had heaps of fun. Jo had pre arranged zombie targets. We shot a 1911 handgun, a pump action shotgun, a M4 and an AK47.

Jo always wanted an Elvis wedding, so we jumped into a limo and went to visit the King. It was super fun and everyone was rad. Elvis made us sing and was a giant

There was a new park built so I went and checked it out. It was massive

This was my favourite

You could just cruise around the whole park trying to deal with what obstacle came up next

Then we hit the road again, headed for Wendover